“‘I wanted to try to write these things down for myself, but I haven’t the heart. I can tell them to you; they are poorly expressed, but keep them for me all the same—they will serve as my journal, and I hope they will let you live a little of my life.’
The letter makes possible a conversation at a distance that softens the harshness of separation; at the same time, in a clear, precise hand, it unfolds a daily account, written without revision, as close as possible to impressions and events, to the rhythm of things seen.
When Marcel Schwob lacks the time and strength to keep his journal in the form of love letters, he apologizes to Marg; he never forgets to send his regards to his wife’s loved ones and to the pups, her miniature dogs awaiting his return; and, coming back exhausted from a temple where he nearly lost his way in the jungle of Ceylon, he worries about Marguerite’s loneliness and her theatrical successes, which are slow in coming.
Marcel Schwob passionately loves the sea: while the passengers begin to complain about the length of the crossing, he never tires of the sky and, above all, the water, ‘undulating and diverse’. He tries to record its colours and fleeting shades—sometimes words fail him; he seeks to paint the sunsets, ever different, the shimmering violence or bleak solitude of seascapes, the sombre mountains of Africa or Arabia, the phosphorescent lights that reveal the life of the depths, and the lights of ships like apparitions in the night. He is delighted to meet M. Alexandre, who has known Courteline and ‘appreciates the subtle shade of a cloud and the radiant hues of sea and sky’. In a spirit of fairness, he does not neglect the fools on board, for their stupidity ‘satisfies the imagination’.”
Bernard Gauthier, The Island of Doubt,
https://www.larevuedesressources.org/L-ile-du-double.html
Wherein Félix concerns himself with the solitude lying in wait within him… What he discovers offers him another way of questioning himself.
– Is he questioning…
– … or questioning himself?
– That is the question…
Félix’s Notebook
For some time now, a strange presence has accompanied me as I write. I would be quite unable to say whether it is in front of me or behind me. It has no face, is not in the room, and belongs to none of the people appearing in the letters and images accumulating around my notebook. Sometimes I feel it draw closer at the very moment I am writing a sentence. That sentence, I gradually sense, ceases to belong to me. It is strange, I know. It continues its movement beyond what I had intended it to say. Somewhere along its trajectory, it makes room for someone I do not know.
I could call this a reader, of course. Immediately I regret having uttered the word, so clearly does it seem to designate something that remains unclear. What I write should be turned entirely towards Lucian. I know this. A reader would be a kind of stowaway. Someone situated beyond me. At the far end of what I write. They would wait for the sentence to be finished before receiving it. Whereas what I am beginning to experience is more like a presence already acting upon the writing before it is even read. And this through no mysterious anticipation. Writing always presupposes that a sentence can leave the person who conceives it. From its very beginning, it carries this possibility of stepping out of the written text. This openness to another, of whom I know nothing, is already part of the way it comes into being.







